Hair Today Gone Tomorrow

That's the best Hair Salon Pun I could remember off hand. Send me some. I love them.

*****

For two days, I slicked my hair back and away from my face for efficiency's sake. I've been wearing my bangs down and floppy since around March, mostly because my new car has ZERO head room. I cut the bangs too short over the weekend however, so I'm wearing my toupee in a style I call the Ken Takahara, as in "Reporting live from the edge of the Volcano on the Big Island, this is Ken Takahara."

I received a heaping assful of unsolicited comments at work:
Whoa! You look smooth. I'd buy anything you sold me.
Whoa! I never knew you were such a pretty boy.
Whoa! I could go for that.
This, mostly from proud rifle toting and beer gut cradling, Simi-Valley, white flight, Nascar, Drill Baby Drill Dads.

Also:
Why are you dressed so nice? Oh, is it because the Big Wigs are here? Yeah.
Man, ever since we all dressed like the boss, your hair has really taken off.
That's a really good look for you, so suave.
Did you get tanned over the weekend?
Wow, that is a nice hair line.
Glad to see Reagan is back.

It's as if the amnesia wagon came by and clocked everyone real good. I've been sporting the Ken Takahara since the 90s, and certainly for almost all of the six years I've been working here. The down do emo look is new, and I can remember a time not long ago when someone looked at my emo hair and said, I'm so glad you are styling your hair this way, you know, not like all the other Asian guys with their hair up like you had it.

Ken was supposed to be an easy fix, but is a distraction as well as a liability. I've seen more people suck in their cheeks and mock my catwalk in the last two days than I desire; and I've been driving in a seating position more supine than is safe in order to keep from smearing pomade on the moonroof.

Today is hair down day, and, because it's officially always summer in L.A., I'm wearing a blue linen shirt with white pants and no regard to my position in space/time relating to Labor Day. Already, I've been told that someone finds my outfit comforting, it reminds him he said of a hard-nosed, edgy, investigative reporter trying to break a big drug cartel story in Indonesia.

Hair up. Hair down. Reporter. That's my deal.